John Waters

The last time the beloved cult director released a mix album under his own name, he gathered together an odd, intriguing, and nonstop fun passel of Christmas tunes. This time the auteur behind Hairspray, Pink Flamingos, and Polyester would like to suggest tunes to play on your next date -- with him. Of course, were you actually to date John Waters (and it's hard to imagine that John Waters has ever been on a real date), you should be aware going in that the man has pretty eclectic taste and a real sense of humor, and that he's something of a perv. So you would have to appreciate a collection that sets off with Patience and Prudence's virginal '50s ballad "Tonight You Belong to Me" (with a name like Patience and Prudence you expected something lurid?) and then dives right into Elton Motello's late-'70s punk onslaught "Jet Boy Jet Girl," with its graphic account of gay sex ("Jet boy, jet girl, gonna take you 'round the world/Jet boy, I'm gonna make you penetrate, I'm gonna make you be a girl"). It doesn't get any less kooky from there. Clarence "Frogman" Henry's "Ain't Got No Home" is a classic N'awlins R&B AM radio staple, but in this context it somehow ends up sounding nasty. Ditto for Ray Charles' "Night Time Is the Right Time." Of course, Waters would want to spin the late "Egg Lady" Edith Massey's version of the Four Seasons' "Big Girls Don't Cry," but it's a mite surprising that the mustachioed one would choose something as relatively sedate as "In Spite of Ourselves," by the singer/songwriters John Prine and Iris DeMent. (Maybe he thought her name was Iris Demented.) Josie Cotton's '80s sensation "Johnny Are You Queer?" is a natural fit, as is Mink Stole's "Sometimes I Wish I Had a Gun." Less so Dean Martin's "Hit the Road to Dreamland" and Eileen Barton's "If I Knew You Were Comin' I'd've Baked a Cake." Well, maybe not such a surprise on that last one, if you know how John Waters' mind works. ~ Jeff Tamarkin, Rovi